I will admit, I don't remember it all and I can't promise this is 100% correct, but as they say in the movies "I can't promise this is how it happened, but this is how I remember it"
I was sitting on the couch thinking (and trying not to hope) that it was time to have my little girl. I was sitting there trying not to time contractions as I had them for weeks and figured it was best to ignore them.
Around 11 I gave up and to try and sleep thinking I would wake up in the morning, again, with no baby.
Much to my surprise I gave up around 1:30am and came downstairs to try and kill more time and maybe time the contractions a bit more. Time passed and they kept coming so I hopped in the shower to try and mellow them out so I could get some sleep as I was still in serious denial that I was finally in real labor and going to meet my little girl.
After a few in the shower I realized it was time and went to wake up Dada, at that point it was about 3:00am.
I woke him up and said "Its time, you need to get up." He said "Time for what?!" I laughed and said "Time to have a baby!".
I called my midwife and told her what was going on. I have a very distinct memory of listening to her on the phone and the tone of voice she was using very obviously made it seem like she thought I wasn't really in labor, but she told me to come in anyway. Apparently I was too calm.
Dada and I woke up your brother, which was really funny because he just laid in his bed all confused and tired. Dada showered and got dressed and we got everyone in the car and headed off to the hospital. I was still feeling a little unsure that I was in labor as I wasn't in any real pain.
I got to the hospital and the midwife saw me and still was pretty sure I wasn't in labor, I was still too calm! Your brother was climbing all over me and the hospital room before Nana and Deepy Deepy came to get him. The midwife was pretty surprised to find me at about 7cm! We knew for sure you were coming! It was probably about 4:30am then when they took the monitors off and just let me do whatever it was I wanted to do.
Shortly after Nana and Deepy Deepy came to pick up your brother and I was still just relaxing and hanging out during contractions. I could still hear everything that was going on around me and the nurse joked that I looked like someone at 3cm instead of 7+. It made me feel really good, like I was doing a good job.
Shortly after that I got in the birthing tub to have some nice warm water around me and relax a bit more. It was wonderful. I was nervous I wasn't going to like it but it was heaven. They also asked me if I would be okay with a nursing student coming in and watching, apparently I was a rare sight ;). I agreed as long as if I wanted her gone for any reason she wouldn't be offended. I didn't feel like it was a likely thing to happen but I wanted to leave myself an "out" if I wanted.
I remember starting to get really sleepy between contractions. They still didn't hurt but it took a lot of energy to focus and just relax. From here I start to get really foggy. I remember being half asleep between contractions and listening to the midwife and the nurse and the student nurse and your Dada talk while I sat in the tub.
I was getting a little anxious as it was nearing 8am and I was ready to be done (which should have been my first clue it wouldn't be long!) and I asked the midwife to check again. She told me there was just a tiny bit left and if I sat on my left side that it would probably move away in a few contractions.
So I got down in the tub and moved to my left side and with the next contraction my water broke! From there it was very intense. I shouted that my water broke and the nurse run up with the monitor to check and make sure your heartbeat was still good and I *had* to push and with just a few short pushes you were born! My little girl was finally here, sitting on my chest!
You didn't pink up quite as quickly as they wanted so they brought you to the warmer and helped me get out of the tub...a lot easier than I thought it would be! They moved me to the bed to get me cleaned up and then brought you back over to me. You had pinked up great with a little bit of O2 and were happy to see me.
You started nursing almost right away and didn't want to give it up! I have a few pictures of you right after birth and they were all with you nursing! I was so glad to have gotten such a wonderful birth and thankful to you for being so good at being born, because I knew I didn't do it alone, you worked just as hard as I did.
We brought you home that evening. You were born at 8:02am and we were home by 8pm, and it felt like you had just always been there. You fit right in with your brother and Dada and I, even the cats welcomed you warmly.
I will admit, I was rather nervous about having a baby girl, I was only used to boys, but you have been such a wonderful and sweet addition to the family and I am so glad I had a little girl.
The last year has been amazing and has gone too fast, as all years do and your family and I are so glad to have you here to love and cuddle and laugh with. You have brought such a wonderful light into our lives. Your brother, Dada, and I love you so much my darling babe.
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Attachemet Parenting
So locally I don't really know any moms that practice attachment parenting and gentle discipline. Well, thats not entirely true, I do know a few that do things very similar but I guess we have never really "talked" about it. Very hard to explain I guess :)
Anyway, I was looking for somewhere online to get advice from other moms in a forum like situation where I could post a question (or they could post a question) and get advice from other gentle discipline/ AP moms, knowing that pooling of knowledge can be very helpful when trying to deal with a 2.5 year old without tearing ones hair out.
Now, I know my 2.5 year old isn't the *only* 2.5 year old that acts like he does but somedays I just don't know what to do or where to turn for advice. I ask my family and I would be told just to spank or do time out. Spanking I am for sure not okay with and time outs, while not horrible, aren't always what I feel like the best choice is. I just feel like there must be a "better way" to deal with some of the stuff he does.
Example? Ivy was 3 or 4 weeks old and in her infant carseat. I had the brilliant thought "Oh its just milk, no biggie" and took both kids in the store with no cart figuring Aaron would follow just fine. He made it as far as the milk aisle before sitting in the middle of it and refusing to move and blocking the lane for several other people. Of course with the infant carrier + infant in one hand and milk in the other I was out of arms and hands to get him up. Every fiber of my being wanted to toss the milk back on the shelf and drag him out of there by his ear.
I stopped, thought a moment about what I could do, and it hit me. "Aaron, can you help Mama get the milk to the register so we can pay for it? It is very heavy and I need your help carrying it." He thought for a second, got up, and grabbed the handle of the milk "helping" me get it to the register.
It was really a rather proud moment for me. We figured out a way to work through that situation without either of us losing our heads. It was a matter of reprogramming my thinking.
Anyway, I have gone off on a tangent here, as I often do. A few of my online friends had been talking about starting a yahoo group for other moms that wanted an attachment parenting friendly place to get advice, so, this morning, I worked out all the back end stuff and set it up!
It has been up for about 12 hours now and so far we are already at almost 50 messages. I am rather impressed and happy at how quickly the new members have jumped in and hope to keep getting new applicants and new members.
If anyone is interested http://groups.yahoo.com/group/lovinglittleones/
Anyway, I was looking for somewhere online to get advice from other moms in a forum like situation where I could post a question (or they could post a question) and get advice from other gentle discipline/ AP moms, knowing that pooling of knowledge can be very helpful when trying to deal with a 2.5 year old without tearing ones hair out.
Now, I know my 2.5 year old isn't the *only* 2.5 year old that acts like he does but somedays I just don't know what to do or where to turn for advice. I ask my family and I would be told just to spank or do time out. Spanking I am for sure not okay with and time outs, while not horrible, aren't always what I feel like the best choice is. I just feel like there must be a "better way" to deal with some of the stuff he does.
Example? Ivy was 3 or 4 weeks old and in her infant carseat. I had the brilliant thought "Oh its just milk, no biggie" and took both kids in the store with no cart figuring Aaron would follow just fine. He made it as far as the milk aisle before sitting in the middle of it and refusing to move and blocking the lane for several other people. Of course with the infant carrier + infant in one hand and milk in the other I was out of arms and hands to get him up. Every fiber of my being wanted to toss the milk back on the shelf and drag him out of there by his ear.
I stopped, thought a moment about what I could do, and it hit me. "Aaron, can you help Mama get the milk to the register so we can pay for it? It is very heavy and I need your help carrying it." He thought for a second, got up, and grabbed the handle of the milk "helping" me get it to the register.
It was really a rather proud moment for me. We figured out a way to work through that situation without either of us losing our heads. It was a matter of reprogramming my thinking.
Anyway, I have gone off on a tangent here, as I often do. A few of my online friends had been talking about starting a yahoo group for other moms that wanted an attachment parenting friendly place to get advice, so, this morning, I worked out all the back end stuff and set it up!
It has been up for about 12 hours now and so far we are already at almost 50 messages. I am rather impressed and happy at how quickly the new members have jumped in and hope to keep getting new applicants and new members.
If anyone is interested http://groups.yahoo.com/group/lovinglittleones/
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
And in a moment...
I am all grown up.
Did you ever have that "ah ha" moment when you suddenly realize you aren't a teen or a "young adult" anymore?
That hit me yesterday. In a single moment I realized that I have my two kids, my two cats, we are closing soon on a new house, and that I am going to be someones landlord. I am going to be in charge of finding us the correct tenant that will pay rent and take care of the house we are in now. I am going to have to handle the phone calls when something breaks and know how to get them fixed. I am going to have to be the one to send letters etc if rent isn't paid. Yikes!
I mean I have been a mom, a good mom, to both my kids for more than 3 years if you count the pregnancy with Aaron. And I have been a wife for about 8 months so neither of those are really that new, it just all suddenly hit at once I guess.
What is fun is in my group of friends I am the "young one" when most of the time I just feel so out of touch with other people my age group.
Anyway I digress.
So yes we now have a new house. We close on the 13th of next month and I have less than a month to pack up a 3 bedroom house with two adults and 2 kids worth of junk in it and move it to the new house. I am so excited to have some more space and a lot more area for storage but still! It will be a fun few weeks.
We have a calendar drawn up on our whiteboard and I have listed projects that need to be done between now and moving (packing up the bookshelves, the desk, extra stuff in the kids rooms, etc) so I can at least *try* to have some organization in this process.
I am excited for my new kitchen that I was drooling over from the moment I saw it.
Did you ever have that "ah ha" moment when you suddenly realize you aren't a teen or a "young adult" anymore?
That hit me yesterday. In a single moment I realized that I have my two kids, my two cats, we are closing soon on a new house, and that I am going to be someones landlord. I am going to be in charge of finding us the correct tenant that will pay rent and take care of the house we are in now. I am going to have to handle the phone calls when something breaks and know how to get them fixed. I am going to have to be the one to send letters etc if rent isn't paid. Yikes!
I mean I have been a mom, a good mom, to both my kids for more than 3 years if you count the pregnancy with Aaron. And I have been a wife for about 8 months so neither of those are really that new, it just all suddenly hit at once I guess.
What is fun is in my group of friends I am the "young one" when most of the time I just feel so out of touch with other people my age group.
Anyway I digress.
So yes we now have a new house. We close on the 13th of next month and I have less than a month to pack up a 3 bedroom house with two adults and 2 kids worth of junk in it and move it to the new house. I am so excited to have some more space and a lot more area for storage but still! It will be a fun few weeks.
We have a calendar drawn up on our whiteboard and I have listed projects that need to be done between now and moving (packing up the bookshelves, the desk, extra stuff in the kids rooms, etc) so I can at least *try* to have some organization in this process.
I am excited for my new kitchen that I was drooling over from the moment I saw it.
Monday, March 9, 2009
I Remember Monday
Stealing a friends Monday theme idea I am afraid.
I remember meeting Pete. I remember thinking that the world would end because of how we ended up getting together. You see, I was dating his college roommate when I met him. I can't be sure this is how it actually happened but this is at least how I remember it.
I had been dating his roommate for about 3 weeks (maybe 4?) and we went to a gathering at the guy I was dating's house. A bunch of odd things happened that night but it ended with the guy I was dating telling me I should go out with Pete and see what happened.
Both Pete and I thought he was crazy. There was *nothing* between us. However knowing he wouldn't let it drop until then, we agreed and went out for a date June 1st, 2002. It was supposed to be the night of my Junior prom but I skipped it and went out with Pete instead. I honestly can't remember what we did on that first date other than drive around a lot. I have memory flashes of a just sitting hanging out in the old Jetta driving through a section of the interstate between Waterbury and Richmond. I remember the dates after that quite clearly though.
There was much drama over the next couple of months as friends divided and took "sides" as everyone realized that Pete and I had a good time on our date and I officially broke it off with his roommate.
Now here we are, almost 7 years later. We have a house and some cars and two beautiful children. Sometimes I go back and read the emails between us over that first summer and remember all the drama and how scary and odd it was at the time. Amazing how a few years changes the view on a situation!
I remember meeting Pete. I remember thinking that the world would end because of how we ended up getting together. You see, I was dating his college roommate when I met him. I can't be sure this is how it actually happened but this is at least how I remember it.
I had been dating his roommate for about 3 weeks (maybe 4?) and we went to a gathering at the guy I was dating's house. A bunch of odd things happened that night but it ended with the guy I was dating telling me I should go out with Pete and see what happened.
Both Pete and I thought he was crazy. There was *nothing* between us. However knowing he wouldn't let it drop until then, we agreed and went out for a date June 1st, 2002. It was supposed to be the night of my Junior prom but I skipped it and went out with Pete instead. I honestly can't remember what we did on that first date other than drive around a lot. I have memory flashes of a just sitting hanging out in the old Jetta driving through a section of the interstate between Waterbury and Richmond. I remember the dates after that quite clearly though.
There was much drama over the next couple of months as friends divided and took "sides" as everyone realized that Pete and I had a good time on our date and I officially broke it off with his roommate.
Now here we are, almost 7 years later. We have a house and some cars and two beautiful children. Sometimes I go back and read the emails between us over that first summer and remember all the drama and how scary and odd it was at the time. Amazing how a few years changes the view on a situation!
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Seasonal Issues
Yep, I am in the thick of seasonal affective disorder. For those not from the north the lack of sunlight in the winter can actually cause depression. I love it up here minus the SAD and the cold.
I keep giving thought to tanning once a week as that helped me in the past when I was having trouble but by the end of the day getting out to go tanning just isn't appealing at all even though I know it would help, it is also not cheap or good for the skin.
I have full spectrum lighting, doesn't really help much I am afraid.
Of course what doesn't help at all is that we have been cooped up so much. Were were sick most of the month of February plus Ivy still usually wants 2 naps a day but won't nap anywhere but her crib and she SCREAMS in the car and makes it near impossible to focus on driving when she screams so much.
I am a *huge* fan of extended rear-facing carseats with kids but I need to admit, I am giving thought to turning her shortly after her 1st birthday. Neither way is safe really as if she is rear facing she is screaming and I am unable to focus so we are more likely to get in an accident but if she is forward facing she is more likely to be injured if we *do* get into an accident.
So instead I end up stuck here at home. So now I am part hermit, though admittedly a slightly sad and lonely hermit. Which in turn aggravates the SAD more. Quite the circle really!
Anyway, I am looking forward to the start of spring because it means that at the very least I can go out in the yard and it means Ivy will be that much closer to one nap a day and *maybe* just *maybe* she will learn to handle the carseat.
Until then I just need to invite as many people over as possible and hope people visit us!
I keep giving thought to tanning once a week as that helped me in the past when I was having trouble but by the end of the day getting out to go tanning just isn't appealing at all even though I know it would help, it is also not cheap or good for the skin.
I have full spectrum lighting, doesn't really help much I am afraid.
Of course what doesn't help at all is that we have been cooped up so much. Were were sick most of the month of February plus Ivy still usually wants 2 naps a day but won't nap anywhere but her crib and she SCREAMS in the car and makes it near impossible to focus on driving when she screams so much.
I am a *huge* fan of extended rear-facing carseats with kids but I need to admit, I am giving thought to turning her shortly after her 1st birthday. Neither way is safe really as if she is rear facing she is screaming and I am unable to focus so we are more likely to get in an accident but if she is forward facing she is more likely to be injured if we *do* get into an accident.
So instead I end up stuck here at home. So now I am part hermit, though admittedly a slightly sad and lonely hermit. Which in turn aggravates the SAD more. Quite the circle really!
Anyway, I am looking forward to the start of spring because it means that at the very least I can go out in the yard and it means Ivy will be that much closer to one nap a day and *maybe* just *maybe* she will learn to handle the carseat.
Until then I just need to invite as many people over as possible and hope people visit us!
Saturday, February 28, 2009
Trying to make changes
I am a junk food junky. I admit it, I know it, I have accepted it.
Lately I have been trying very hard to change that. It is not as easy to break those habits.
I love my oreos, my fritos, my coke.
We started with small things. Not keeping cookies in the house. Not buying chips. Then buying better alternatives.
I just ate some frosted mini-wheats for a snack instead of what would have been oreos less than 2 weeks ago.
I have gotten rid of the coke and replaced it with water or heavily watered down juice. I do still have an occasional vitamin water but no more coke. If I need a caffeine pick me up I will have some regular tea. Not nearly as much caffeien and not chuck full of empty calories as my beloved coke.
Other things we have done? I have stopped buying everything pre-made and started doing a meal plan for the week. This was a huge deal for me as quick and easy is just so much nicer with children running about and climbing stairs etc. I have learned the crockpot love and am still learning how to do actual meal plans but in addition to being healthier and not as loaded with preservatives, it also has save a *ton* on our grocery bills.
Do I still have an occasional treat? Of course! Do I feel the *need* to have sweets or salt every night? I suppose I still crave it a bit but not like I used to and I am pretty sure with a little more time it will get easier. I even went to the store earlier to get a couple small things and kept myself from buying potato chips and sprite.
Yay!!!
Lately I have been trying very hard to change that. It is not as easy to break those habits.
I love my oreos, my fritos, my coke.
We started with small things. Not keeping cookies in the house. Not buying chips. Then buying better alternatives.
I just ate some frosted mini-wheats for a snack instead of what would have been oreos less than 2 weeks ago.
I have gotten rid of the coke and replaced it with water or heavily watered down juice. I do still have an occasional vitamin water but no more coke. If I need a caffeine pick me up I will have some regular tea. Not nearly as much caffeien and not chuck full of empty calories as my beloved coke.
Other things we have done? I have stopped buying everything pre-made and started doing a meal plan for the week. This was a huge deal for me as quick and easy is just so much nicer with children running about and climbing stairs etc. I have learned the crockpot love and am still learning how to do actual meal plans but in addition to being healthier and not as loaded with preservatives, it also has save a *ton* on our grocery bills.
Do I still have an occasional treat? Of course! Do I feel the *need* to have sweets or salt every night? I suppose I still crave it a bit but not like I used to and I am pretty sure with a little more time it will get easier. I even went to the store earlier to get a couple small things and kept myself from buying potato chips and sprite.
Yay!!!
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